[Blood Sucking Beauty]'s diary

1128200  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2011-01-04
Written: (3209 days ago)

Your the air that I breath
The Thoughts that cross my mind
You're my beating heart
And my always taking steps
I am the flea
And you are the dog
I am the cell
And you are the human
I am the flower
And you are my sun

Serious roughdraft. will be improved overtime. i just needed somewhere to write it down.

1119014  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2010-07-05
Written: (3392 days ago)

YAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! A NEW RP!

The New RP

1110053  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-02-12
Written: (3534 days ago)

im heading out to the hookah bar with my friends for my friend Maria's 19th birthday. YAY! Hookah ish gooooooooodddddd. ok so i will edit every wiki tomorrow....that is if James hasn't confiscated me. lol

1108821  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2010-01-30
Written: (3548 days ago)

feeling depressed. I didn't see James yesterday and i wont see him tonight because he is being a dick. im sorry im just not in the mood for roleplaying.

1107974  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-01-22
Written: (3555 days ago)

ok so life has been REALLLLYYYYYY hectic. james and i broke up for about like 2 or 3 hours. it tore me apart so much that i seriously contimplated suicide. that was the reason or our next fight. He's aloud to punch walls, walk and hour to my house in cold weather and punch car mirrors getting SEVERAL cuts on his knuckles... but im not allowed to take a pair of scissors and make the tiniest scrap on my foot(Didn't even break the skin). But than he's allowed to take his pocket knife(Really big and sharp) and press it against his wrist finding the vein trying to die. Uhg. but we fixed that and a few days later we celebrated 5 months. it's now been 5 months and 4 days. i love him! I decided that i WILL give him the promise ring for 6 months/valentines day. Yea...him n i have been fighting a lot but we have also seen that we love eachother a lot more. at least i have. He is beginning to lost his trust for me and faith for us. how will it work if he doesn't have trust and faith. idk. i do love him tho. way too much.

1107043  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2010-01-13
Written: (3565 days ago)

everyone i promise i will be on tomorrow and i will update all of the pages once i get on. and An Immortal's Quest i will start up tomorrow so everyone be ready.

1106478  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-01-08
Written: (3570 days ago)

Been trying to finish up the Taiwanese version of Boys Over Flowers. (Hana Yori Dango in Japanese) Guna be a bit before i finish the series so i wont be on much until its done. Sorry everyone.

1106032  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2010-01-04
Written: (3574 days ago)

Sorry I've been gone everyone. I've been so busy with the holidays. I've spent every day of the holiday vacation with my boyfriend. I havn't had a day without him yet therefore was unable to get onto ET. I'm only on for a few minutes now to check up on what i can quickly. i will be on more tomorrow when James starts school again and I will be stuck at home...that is after i apply for jobs and finish watching all of "The Crow" movies. *shrugs* send me messages. I miss you all dearly.

1105167  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-12-25
Written: (3584 days ago)


1104922  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-12-22
Written: (3587 days ago)

Ok so christmas is coming up in just a few more days. I have no gifts for anyone except James. I still need to get something for my brother, his girlfriend, their two kids, and my mother. Oh fuck. Ok so i have NO money. I owe my mom $60.00 for my boyfriend's gift. I'm planning on just painting my mom her favorite football team logo.

I have all the supplies needed...i just need the time to do it. And every time i attempt drawing that i fail. Uhg. it's frustrating since i only have today and tomorrow to be able to do it. So don't expect to find me on much. and than on top of that i cant buy my brother or his gf anything. they both know i have no money so they may understand that i cant buy them anything but than it makes me feel like shit cuz i bought my boyfriend a $65 gift and them nothing. I just don't know what to do. *sigh* don't expect me on too much. i need to find out what to wear to James's family dinner on Christmas day(they are also a diff religion than i am) and what to wear to my own family gathering on Christmas Eve and help James pick out something for both days for the same gatherings....uhg...and than the gifts. Fuck procrastinating.

also....im massively cleaning since the Eve Party is at my house. FUCKING A! Wish me luck all....be on when I can.

<3 Kittie <3

1104535  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-12-18
Written: (3590 days ago)


Love your Kittie,
1104444  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-12-18
Written: (3591 days ago)

DONE SCHOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1104324  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-12-17
Written: (3592 days ago)

Ok so as far as i know, i am done Computers and i failed that class. :( it was actually quite difficult. and than Painting class is also done and from what i know, i passed that. ^.^ Also my teacher took 4 of my paintings to submit them in the art gallery. It's so exciting. The Gallery will be from September-around thanksgiving. So about a year from now i will get them back. That is if all of them are put into the gallery which is kinda unlikely....hence why she took the 4 best(in her opinion) in my opinion i liked 2 of them she gave back to me. *shrugs* oh well.....whatever. At least i got my favorite ones back.

ok enough of that class. Today I have Government(I'm pretty sure i do) and I will be taking the last test in that class which isn't a final, instead it's just a chapter test. Thank god. I didn't do any of the essays but i will talk to my teacher and see if i can email them to him either tonight or tomorrow.

And than tonight i take the final for Western Civilization II. That may actually be tough. I have to write 2 quick paragraphs on two of the 8 topics she gave us, memorize those 2 and than rewrite them for the final. UHGGGGG. I may be slick and type them onto my Iphone and copy that......:/ i'm not very good at memorizing things.

well wish me luck. after today i am fully done classes until next fall. I'm taking a little while off. well......cheerio!

<3 Toshi-chan <3

1104162  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-12-16
Written: (3593 days ago)


Tuesday Dec 15th 2009
9:55am-11:25am Computers
Turned in final project, skipped final
11:35am-1:05pm Government

Wednesday Dec 16th 2009
6:00pm-900pm Painting
Final class,hand in final painting(Not complete)
Sometime before 2:00pm
Do Computer Final

Thursday Dec 17th 2009
9:55am-11:25am Computers
No Class
11:35am-1:05pm Government
Test 5 Chapter 9, Hand in essays
6:35pm-9:35pm Western Civ II
Final Exam

Friday Dec 18th 2009
4 Months with James
Make dinner
1103151  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-12-09
Written: (3599 days ago)

Apparently I'm a masochist........
and a Nympho.......
Stupid Boys

1103150  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-12-09
Written: (3599 days ago)

Final weeks of school

Wednesday-Dec 9th 2009
6:00pm-10:00pm Painting
Finish up final painting. Returned older paintings

Thursday-Dec 10th 2009
9:55am-11:25am Computers
Present final project
11:35am-1:05pm Government
Makeup Test 4, current events, start chapter 9
6:35pm-9:35pm Western Civ. II
Finish PowerPoint

Friday Dec 11th 2009
No Classes

Monday Dec 14th 2009
No Classes

Tuesday Dec 15th 2009
9:55am-11:25am Computers

Wednesday Dec 16th 2009
6:00pm-900pm Painting
Final class,hand in final painting

Thursday Dec 17th 2009
9:55am-11:25am Computers
11:35am-1:05pm Government
Test 5 Chapter 9, Hand in essays

Oh what a fun week it will be. At least I will be with James a lot and the 18th will be 4 months.

1103120  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-12-09
Written: (3600 days ago)

the rest of this week is going to be shit
Its Wednesday so i dont get to see James till friday. and on top of that my mom is telling my brothers(billy) gf(Suzy) that she needs to get out by friday since they both have lived with my mom and i for over 2 years. they had a baby together who is going to be a year on new years eve and she has a 4 year old son as well. So my house is a mess. everyone there mentioned lives here with us. now my brother is not agreeing on kicking Suzy out obviously so he is pitching a bitch about it. So basically I am not trying to be home Friday but i have nowhere to go. I'm trying to spend Friday night at James's house but he doesn't get home from school till three and i'd leave my house around 2 to take the bus and get there. so thats from 2 on friday till saturday gone but what about in the morning. ill have to be around for the war and thats not something i want to be involved in cause for once i am not apart of this. Uhgggggg idk. im getting stressed out about it.

whatever. hopefully all goes well. i have way too much on my plate. finals for college and home-life and Christmas coming up and i have NO money. UHGGGGGGG so frustrating so if you see my posting slowing down or changing slightly....youll know.

thanks all


1102793  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-12-07
Written: (3602 days ago)

1. What was the highlight of your week?
So far it's been with James. I love it when he just holds me and whispers sweetly in my ear.

2. Whose car were you in last, besides family?
Ummmm if i remember correctly it would be James's parents car

3. When is the next time you will kiss someone?
at around 3:00 when James gets off the bus and sees me standing at his front door.

4. What color shirt are you wearing?

5. How long is your hair?
Medium long

6. Are you good looking?
Sorta kinda....James thinks i am.

7. Last movie you watched?
Ummmm hmmmm P.S. I Love You

8. Who were you with?

9. Last thing you ate?
Chicken Tenders

10. Last thing you drank?
Whole Milk

11. When was the last time you had your heart broken?
about a year ago. but that doesn't matter now.

12. Who came over last?

13. Are you happy right now?
id be happier in his arms

14. What did you say last?

15. Where is your phone?
Right beside me

16. What color are your eyes?
Honey brown

17. Are you left-handed?

18. Spell your name without vowels:

19. Do you have any pets?
Two cats, Raven and Guess, and a bunny, BooBoo.

20. Favorite Vacation?

21. What do you dislike currently?
Having to do this stupid computers project consisting of Excel, Powerpoint, and Word,....all do tomorrow.

22. What are you listening to?
atm 98 degrees but soon ill be putting on some All That Remains or BassHunter

23. If you could have one thing right now what would it be?

24. What is your favorite scent?
James's cologne called Deisel

25. Who makes you happiest?

26. What were you doing at midnight last night?

27. When is your birthday?
June 22nd

28. Who has the same phone as you?
My brother Billy, his gf's ex, and my friend Grant. LMAO everyone has an Iphone these days

29. Last time you went swimming in a pool?
I believe it was like August

30. Do you read your horoscope?
Not the often

31. Where was the last place you bought something?
Hmmmmmmmm i have to think about that one......I guess WaWa when i bought cigarettes

32. How do you feel about your hair right now?
Hate it....need it redyed and cut

33. Do you bite your nails?
No way!

35. Do you have any expensive jewelery?

36. Myspace or facebook?

37. How fast have you driven a car?
I think like 25 or 35 seeing as how i don't drive

38. Whats something you like that you think most ppl dont?
Not quite sure really.....

39. What was or is your favorite subject in school?

40. Do you have Verizon?

41. What type of boy or girl do you usually fall for?
well it used to be the gothicish boys that not many people liked....but now i love my ghetto metalhead gamer.

42. Do you have any hidden talents?
I'd like to think so

43. Favorite Song?
Too many to pick one

44. Do you like to sing at all?
All the time!

45. Dream Job?
Large Animal Veterinarian

46. Where does most of your family live?

47. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?
Two older brothers

48. Do you love your parents?
Only my mother.

49. What was the first thing you thought when you woke up?
"Guta go talk to James" ^.^

50. Do you drink?
No. I hate alcohol

51. Know any other languages?
sorta kinda....

52. Ever write a coded message?

53. Have you ever been IN a wedding?

54. Do you have any children?
not that i know of. lmao altho James keeps saying he is pregnant. LMMFFAO

55. Did you take a nap today?

56. Who has the same birthday as you?
Many of my friends

57. Ever met anyone famous before?
i think so yea

58. Do you want to be famous one day?

59. Any Pet Peeves?
Yeah.. Plenty

60. Are you multitasking right now?

61. Do you like Britany Spears?
she can still sorta sing....but i dont like her as a person

62. What is your least favorite chore?
hmmm moping

63. Last place you drove your car?
Dont drive

64. Ever been out of the country?

65. Where were you born?
On a bed In a room in a hospital in a town in a city in a county in a state in a country in a world in a universe.....ok im stopping

66. Could you handle being in the military?
No fucking way

67. What is your average cell phone bill?
Don't know....my mom deals with that

68. Who are you thinking about right now?

69. When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
Last night when James put on my tight jeans. I almost fell off the bed laughing so hard.

70. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
Way too many

71. Are your toes always painted?
Usually yea

72. How many piercings do you have?
Ears, eyebrow, belly button

73. What are you doing today?
Doing my project for computers class and than taking the bus to see James

74. Have you ever been gambling?

75. When is the last time you updated your page?
i think a few weeks ago

76. Do you like rollercoasters?

77. Have you ever been to disneyland or world?
World. Twice..

78. Do you have a favorite cartoon character?

79. Last thing you cooked?
Chicken tenders

80. How's the weather?
Cold and windy

81. Do you e-mail?
only my professors

82. What's the stupidest thing you ever did with your cell phone?
Ummmmmmmmmmmmm dropped it while at work and broke the screen....stupid iphone....

83. Last time you were sick?
ummmm right now

85. Do you wish you could move?

86. Do you take all the QuizPox.com quizzes?

87. What is your dream car?
Metallic Blue 2005 Chevy Cobalt SS Super-chargered (That is my car)

88. Have you ever wanted someone you cant have?
yes a very very long time ago

89. If you could be anywhere right now where would it be?
In James's arms.

90. Are you happy with your life?

1102641  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2009-12-06
Written: (3603 days ago)

I'm feeling the weight of a possible breakup to come. I don't want to lose him. I CAN'T lose him. He is the reason I breath my every breath and he is every beat of my heart. He is every cell in my body and every organism not. He is the entire world, the ground I walk on, the water i drink, the food i eat, and the animals i love. He is it all. All I ever see is him and all i ever think is him. all the words that come from my mouth are about him or based off of him. My every day life revolves entirely around him. I wake early in the morning to speak to him and try to pass time when I can't see or talk to him. I actually pay attention in classes so I can get out of there sooner so i can sleep till i see him or somehow occupy myself. I sleep in on weekends till he comes to my side and i stay up late and rise early when he sleeps by my side. I find myself waking often when he is sleeping with me so i can just simply look at his face. I will drop everything for him. I find myself waking from the dead of sleep to hold him and look deep into his eyes until i fall asleep again. I would run a hundred miles just to be able to simply hold his hand. His kisses send me into space and his hugs make me cry not from sadness but from joy. Im glad to have a man like him in my life. a true one of a kind. he thinks of himself as good for nothing and not worth a thing but to me, i feel like an tiny flea compared to him. He is the vast world and i am a tiny microscopic organism fighting to live another night in the wholeness of him. I love my James so entirely that it's painful. I cry at the thought of him walking away and never turning back. I want to die at the thought of him gone. Even when he leaves me alone at night standing on my doorstep watching him and his father drive away, my chest starts to hurt and I want to curl in a ball and die until he is by my side again. I'd hate to compare this true devotional love to something as what seems to be lame as twilight but I really am Bella and he is my Edward. Wholly and entirely he is my life. I would want to spend eternity and infinity with him if I possibly could. But for now, i want to grow old with him, i want to have his children and bare his last name. I want all of it. I wish he wants it too. I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him
I can't seem to say it enough.

My James, My Love, My Life, My Eternity,
I Love You More Than Could Ever Be Imagined
♥♥♥♥ Please, Stay By My Side Forever. ♥♥♥♥

♥ I love you, ♥
Your Kittie, Your Toshi, Your Rachel

 The logged in version 

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