[~lil cutie~]'s diary

947459  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2007-06-11
Written: (5017 days ago)

Dear Mommy,

I am in heaven now, sitting on Jesus' lap.He loves me and cries with me; for my heart has been broken. I so wanted to be your little girl. I don't quite understand what happened.
I was so excited when i started realizing my existence.I was in a dark yet comfortable place. I saw i had fingers and toes. I was pretty far along in my developing, yet not near ready to leave my surroundings. I spent most of my time thinking or sleeping. Even from my early days, I felt a special bonding between me and you.
Sometimes i heard you crying and i cried with you. Sometimes you would yell or scream, then cry. I heard daddy yelling back. I was sad and hoped you would be better soon. I wondered why you cried so much. One day you cried almost all of the day. I hurt for you. I couldnt imagine why you so unhappy.
That same day the most horrible thing happened. A very mean monster came into that warm comfortable place i was in. I was so scared, i began screaming, but there was no sound. I guess they had you all pinned down, because you never once tried to help me. Maybe you never heard me. The monster got closer and closer as i was screaming and screaming. Complete terror is all that i felt. I screamed until i thought i couldnt anymore. Then the monster started ripping my arm off. It hurt so bad, the pain i could never explain. It didnt stop. Oh how i begged it to stop, i screamed in horror as it ripped my leg off. though i was in complete pain, I realized i was dying. I knew i would never see your face or hear how you loved me. I wanted to make all your tears go away. I had so many plans to make you happy. Now i couldnt; all my dreams were shattered. Though i was in utter pain and horror, I felt the pain of my heart breaking, above all. I wanted more than anything to be your daughter. No use now, for i was dying a painful death. I could only imagine what terrible things they were doing to you.
I wanted to tell you that i love you before i was gone, but i didnt know the words you could understand. And soon i no longer had the breath to say them, i was dead. I felt myself rising. I was being carried by a huge angel into a big, beautiful place. I was still crying but the physical pain was gone. The angel took me to Jesus and sat me on His lap. He said He loved me, and He was my Father. Then i was happy. I asked Him what the thing was that killed me.
He answered,"Abortion, i am sorry my child; for i know how it feels." I dont know what abortion is; i guess thats the name of the monster.
Im writing to say that i love you and to tell you how much i wanted to be your little girl. I tried very hard to live. I had the will, but i couldnt. The monster was too powerful. It sucked my arms and legs off and finally got all of me. It was impossible to live. I just wanted you to know i tried to stay with you. I didnt want to leave. Also, mommy, please watch out for that abortion monster. Mommy, i love you and i would hate for you to go the kind of pain i did. Please be careful.

Your baby girl

If this story does not melt your heart then you are a sick fuck. If this story touches your heart then repost this.

699982  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-11-17
Written: (5588 days ago)
Next in thread: 699986, 700569, 706196

why?? yesterday my dad went into back surgery at 9 am well the surgery went well but after the surgery his heart stopped 3 times and on the forth time well..... he didnt make it. he died a 2:45 the docters dont know why he died yet but they are doing an obtopisy. he was not susposed to die, there were slim chances that he was gonna be parlized but not dieing. why did this have to happen. i was daddys girl. i'm not a mommys girl it just dont work that way in my book. plus today a year ago opa died.

624271  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-07-15
Written: (5713 days ago)
Next in thread: 625716, 631858

grrrrr today i went to the docters and i find out i have strep throat!!! joy frecken joy!!!!!

592229  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-06-07
Written: (5752 days ago)

well not much has happend today except i got up a nine oclock to bring my grandma to onamia then got home at like eleven oclock and went back to sleep tell three oclock then i talked on the phone then came on the internet. fun huh?

585209  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-05-28
Written: (5761 days ago)
Next in thread: 590651

yay i am sooooo happy my b/f came home like 3 days ago. plus we kissed!!yay
yay i only have 2 day left of school

574739  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-05-14
Written: (5775 days ago)
Next in thread: 574741, 590652

god i miss my boyfriend soooooooo much. i just wish he would come home. i am so sad.

534559  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-03-28
Written: (5822 days ago)

Well its the day after easter. and nothin intreastion has happend. sept that my cousin and his wife are getting a divorce. i dont want them to get a divorce. cuz i love my cousins wife very much. she is just like me . she knows what teenage life is like. she is the only person i talk to bout my problems sienc my great grand father died.

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