[The MysticSphinx]'s diary

713274  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-12-10
Written: (5565 days ago)

How far from grace have we fallen?
Lost, scarred, wasted, and forgotten.
How far from God have we stumbled?
Blasphemous, pain-hungry, hurt, and humbled.

How far from You have I run?
All for the sake of twisted fun.
How far from the ideal have I flown?
Tormented, lovely, and unknown.

How far from He have we gone?
Thinking everything right is wrong.
And how far from His grace have we fallen?
Lost, scarred, wasted, and forgotten.

How far from His ways are we falling?
Entwined in different notes, song, and calling.
And who in our dreams do we see?
An angel, a blessing, taken from thee.

705338  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-11-27
Written: (5579 days ago)

I miss him
I love him
I /trust/ him, poor me
I Know him
I feel him
I.. I dont know...I think about him. All the time.
And you'd think...
That i'd be over it by now.
I never...
What is it?
I think i'm in...something
In trouble.
And i thought, after a while
That it wasnt love.
It must be...right?
God...I dont know. I"m so confused.
My feelings are jumbled.
I think if i dont see him soon,
I'll go under.
I dont know...
Probably not.
And at least i'm honest...
Call me by name
Call me.
I found one the other day.
The first in a long while
And it made me smile.
And i put it with the others.
And it felt special.
More so than the rest.
Because i didnt even...mean to find it
Not that i meant the other ones, but...
I dont know.
Someone talk to me about all this.
I think i need....
Well, i need again.
I want again.
And i think i like it.
More and more.
And i deffinately want him.

692147  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-11-03
Written: (5602 days ago)

*whimpers* Rachel, help me. Please, help me. I dont wanna be a whore...please....I need someone to talk to..Theres no one here anymore...who likes me...or is uncomfortable around me...or who i can talk to...i dont want to be a whore anymore...i just want to go home...please...someone...

674791  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-10-01
Written: (5635 days ago)

Enough feathers to make myself a pair of wings...and every time i see one, i'm reminded that i am loved. And it makes me want to cry. So badly. But i cant. I never can. I'm heading towards a break down. I cry at every little thing, but only a few tears. I'm heading towards a break down. I cant really cry. Its bad...everythings bad...oh, gods, i need....I need again. I need someone to say 'i love you.' and Eliyk does. And i dont want to hear it, damn it. I dont want to hear that from him. He's my BROTHER. My FATHER. I dont want that.

666809  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-09-17
Written: (5650 days ago)

I found a place
I stood above
I learned of peace
I learned of love

I found triumph
In my hand
I reached out
To understand

I could almost touch it
And I almost believed
I was almost there
Love, truly, was almost conceived

But it was shattered
By the dawn
By the dew
And sun-sparkled lawn

And my memories
They all seem
So unreal
So like a dream

The night was blessed
Yet cursed as well
A mix of heaven
Earth, and hell.

604939  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-06-22
Written: (5737 days ago)

It feel so weird, but...i'm...happy. I've been happy. I dont know why, but...i'm happy.

600235  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-06-16
Written: (5742 days ago)

When you write what the world feels, you speak to the world. When you write what you feel, you speak to no one. When you write what those like you feel, you speak to a selective audience. For once, cant we just....speak for the sake of speech?

 The logged in version 

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