Onward to: Uni Pubbage and Other Alcohol Induced Insanity 2
and Other Alcohol Induced Insanity
Gay Scott = The Scott that Big Emma & Big Steph know
Scott (Or Lesbian) = Our Scott
Ah, now 'cos then it all goes wixey... I mean whiskey
Everyone knows I'm an ass man
Yeah Scott, but do you give or take?
She's plotting something....
*innocent look*....*huuuge burp* *VERY satisfied look* xD
Ian *whines* She nailed me....
*Big Steph flops in Ian's lap*
Ian Oh hang on, crotch. Your bun was fondling something
Ian *about Big Emma* It's like an alcoholic cat
Lil Emma I cant spell alcoholic right.
Big Steph Is that because you're in denial?
Ian It gets softer and softer the longer I play with it
Big Emma Isn't it supposed to go the other way?
Big Emma *talking about belly button fluff* Oh no, it's just men. Cos their hormones suck in the fluff
Big Steph *Whilst grabbing Lil Emma* Poke Her!
Ian No shes all wet
Ian You know where a dog sniffs something and perks up. My gaydar is like that, but it perks up at everyone
Ian It's not meant to come out like that
Big Steph It always does Ian
Ian *after staring at cute bartenders* Who's the one with the baguette? He's clearly gay. Holding something long and hard.
*Shouted in the MIDDLE of Newcastle*
Bryoni I might take ALL my clothes off!
Matt The Great North Run is still on?!
Matt Are you saying that my cock is an emotion?
Big Emma Well you feel it ALL the time
Ian I thought everything was wedged to one side
Lil Emma I tried to spell 'one' with a 'w' just then...
Big Steph *Humps Ian*....*spills drink*....Whoops I splurged
Ian Jeez didn't take you long!
Lil Emma *after Steph unhooked her bra by lifting her shirt* You cheated! You can't look! Hook it back up again, and this time you do it properly woman!
Ian I just stuck my tongue out and hoped for the best
Bryoni We've got two 12" peaches coming
Lil Emma Peaches?
Bryoni What did I say?
Lil Emma You said peaches
Lil Emma You meant pizzas dear
*Steph unhooks Lil Emma's bra in record time*
Bryoni That's quite impressive
Big Steph I'm a lesbian. What did you expect?
Big Steph Why am I the only one in a bra?
Big Emma Cos you haven't taken mine off yet
Big Steph Every step you take, Every move you make, I'll be stalking you
Big Emma When she made me try that bra it was like peas in egg cups
Lil Emma I'll stick my feet in your face
Ian I'll stick something else in your face, then you'll be complaining
Big Emma And by that, he means a rodent...And by a rodent, he means something that eats cheese...And by something that eats cheese, he means a mouse...And by mouse, he means he'll stick his cock in your face
Ian *loud Burrrrpppp* *satisfied look* Heh
Ian *pokes Big Steph's bum* I can't help it. My fingers just find it
Big Emma I think I have the hiccups....But in burp form
Ian *sticks a flying saucer on his nose* *grins* Me special
Big Steph ....Nobhead
Big Steph I tried to undo Ian's bra. It took me a minute until I realised he doesn't have one
Lil Emma I didn't realise anything was wrong with that 'til you said he doesnt have one
Big Steph Right. I vote we take our bra's off
Big Emma *Frantic struggle to get bra out* I WIN!....Was it not a race?
Big Steph *directed at Ian* When did you have semi straight days? Back when you were pre-hormonal and couldn't control your erections?
Matt If you punched Ghandi, would he punch back?
Matt Good now all I need is a time machine
Lil Emma It was hanging off and needed eating
Lil Emma I need my teddy
Ian I can give you a finger?
Ian Classy bird!
Lil Emma What, forking instead of spooning?
Ian I'm all wet, I'm more wet than usual
Ian I'm getting them up so I can bend them over
Big Emma He was practically wagging his cock at you
Big Steph Four puffs and a piano
Matt What and I'm the piano?
Big Emma Cos everyone plays you Matt
Big Steph Emma? When did you grow a penis?
Ian I've never had one that long....Oooh is he close?
Ian Matt why are your feet really dirty?
Matt It's cos I've been kicking niggas
Matt I'm not putting my finger in anymore holes. It's not good for you
Big Emma It's dark. We're allowed to be pissed
Big Emma What's this dangley bit here?
Big Emma I could murder a danzig....You are talking about kormas right?
Big Emma There's no need to jiggle it!
Matt I can hear music....
Chris ....That's the toilet
Lil Emma You're just jealous cos my balls are sparkly
Matt *sings in Newcastle* I'm gonna stick my willy in your mouth
Ian The level of shock on my face, it just came all over me
Anna He can't he's got no balls
Lil Emma I don't drink cheese before bed
Bryoni It's not as big. Sorry I was never very good at math
Ian It's like a hamster with a new wheel or a dog with a new leg...
Lil Emma O_o New leg??
Ian ...To hump
Ian I can't help it. I can't control my tongue
Big Steph Ian are you a cheesy puff?
Big Emma Only when he hasn't showered in a few days
Ian They're discussing my balls
Big Steph *mishearing* We're not cupping!
Ian It's very gay. It's shiney
Big Emma (I think) Would you eat Steve?
Lil Emma Are you ORGANISING your ice cubes?
Ian *indignant* There's nothing wrong with organising your ice cubes! *huffs*
Big Emma Sometimes they come 'pre-organised'
Lil Emma You're organinsing them so all the holes point up aren't you?
Ian I've got all the holes empty now
Matt I'm getting pregnant just looking at you
Scott Where did he touch you?
Lewis You went...What's that word?
Scott Go by my rule
Ian & Lil Emma *Simultaneously* What? Fuck everything?
Rachel Oh Ian, Oh no, Oh why?!
Ian I was wondering what was in his mouth
Lil Steph Quick! I'm dripping!
Lil Steph If it's sticky and toffee like then you need it checked out
Ian Steph stop blowing it
Lil Steph I can't swallow it!
Lil Steph That woulda bin funny if I'd thought it out...
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