[.:Obsession:.]'s diary

598696  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-06-15
Written: (5405 days ago)
Next in thread: 604043

Ok I need serious help here guys! Anyone's advice is welcome and desperately needed!

Ok, Here we go, just a warning, it's a hella long story!

My ex who's name is Travis and I started going out about 6 months ago and everything went cool, but about 2 weeks ago I broke it off with him cuz he wouldn't stop talking about his ex girlfriends and other stuff. I didn't want to really, cuz I still loved him, but I knew I needed some time to figure stuff out. Well, There's this thing called StockShow here, and it's like this big ol' thing. Anyways, there was a dance on Thursday, and since I'm grounded, I couldn't go. But Travis (the ex) Called and kind of asked for me back *in a way* and I said I needed to think. So the next day I hear that there's these two girls that he was practically screwing on the dance floor (dancing hella dirty). And that upset me a bit. Then a mutual Friend of ours told me that one of them HAS screwed him. So on Monday I called him and I told him to be 100 percent straight up with me, and he admitted that they did. The night before, in "our spot" It absolutely broke my heart. I love him so much and I just couldn't take it. I cried for forever and junk. He apologized profusely and told me he didn't know why and that he still loved me and etc. I know I shouldn't care because we weren't officially "together" but if he still really loved me why would he do that? Everyone has told me since we first started going out that I was too good for him and deserved someone better. I just don't know what to do!

And then to add more on top of it. There's another guy...ok 2 others that I like. I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING WITH EITHER THOUGH! no matter how tempted I was. One's name is Jake, the other is Matt. I know Jake likes me *atleast I think I know that?* And then there's matt. Wow. Matt. Ok he's a whole nother story. We went to Homecoming at his school like 4 months ago, then I see him at stockshow. But there's another girl who likes him (one of the girls that could have been screwing my ex on the dance floor) and she likes him, but she's a total skank. Anyways, his best friend kevin told me that the only reason he was even looking sideways at her was because he was drunk and that Matt still really liked me. And then this girls sister told me that matt told her the same thing, and that he only thought of her as a piece of ass. But this girl is SUPPOSEDLY my friend although she was all over my ex even when we were together.

So I have no Idea. Maybe I'm just being a whiny little puss bitch. But I am so confused and could seriously use some advice!

Thanks for listening to my sob story
xoxo Nikki

416811  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-11-18
Written: (5614 days ago)
Next in thread: 417131, 417684

wow...yet another problem for me. My life's too dramatic...but what the hay, might as well type it even if its just to make me feel better.

Ok, this guy I'm with..um I think...Yeah I'll start the story from the beginning. 2 summers ago i started going out with him, it was all good till school started and then he dumped me because of all the "hot chicks" at his new school.l

3 months ago I ran into him and i saw him once in a while, then he asked me back out...I was like ok sure. So everything goes great for a while...Then some stuff starts happening, like he might have to go back to Mclaren (Youth authority..."juvy" "lock up") so he tells me that he didn't think he should have a girl friend at the time. After a week everything is cleared up so he asks me back out. Everything goes good for a while until I asked him about something I thought I saw *him with another chick* He totally flipped and dumped me cuz "I didn't trust him" Then this last Friday he shows up at my house with a letter, he gives it to me and leaves. It explains how much he loves me and how he knows its hard for me to trust guys, etc. So we're back together again. Then on Sunday he was having a really bad day so we went shopping so he didn't have to hang around at his house *he lives in a sort of "foster home" cuz he's with OYA *(Oregon Youth Authority) so yeah he gets in a way better mood and stuff. He was grounded at the time but since his foster "parent" likes me he let him go. So he hasn't called since then, not a word, and since I can't call him on his phone cuz his cell is turned off *being grounded* I could call up straight to their house but I've never done that, just called on his cell phone. Yeah so I have no clue what's going on...

Please help me!....?

393344  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-10-28
Written: (5636 days ago)
Next in thread: 394405, 394419

Wow I'm so confused... Some body give me some advice on this situation...PLEAZE!!!:

Last night my boyfriend and I *for the first time*"dry fucked" or for people that don't know what that is, he didn't penetrate...*that sounds so disgusting* and anyway, He said, during this "You have no idea how much I love you right now" And he had told me before that he loved me...But after that I asked him if he only told me that because of what we had been doing and he said "No, I just said it then". And then he said "You don't believe me do you?" and I said no, because I don't trust guys that easily. And he said "ok fine, from now on until you believe me, no more physical stuff, holding hands, hugs, and little kisses is the only thing we'll do until you believe me that I really love you and it's not just a physical thing"
The next day he came with my mom when she picked me up from school and on the ride home he held my hand like normal but he looked kind of sad/mad. I asked him what was wrong and he said "I've been mad at myself today and last night about what i said. I shouldn't have said it that way" I told him I wasn't mad and he said "but you don't trust me!" and pulled his hands away from me. I looked away from him and started tearing up a bit and he told me that he wasn't worth crying for. Well instead of coming to my house he said he wanted to go home so we dropped him off. He got out of the car and so did I so i could get in front and I was taking off his sweatshirt to give it back to him and he told me to keep it. He just stood there so I grabbed him and hugged him, he did hug me back. He told me to call him later so I did. At first his phone was off, then he answered but told me he'd call me back later....And he still hasn't called me. I don't know what's going on, What should I do? Should I be mad? or what? all i have done is cry, so im just confused

Thanks for the help : )

283864  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2004-07-12
Written: (5743 days ago)
Next in thread: 283877

i havent written in one...two...three...four...five days!! jeez-o! *hangs head in shame * i was at the Elgin stampede which was MAJOR fun. you shoulda seen jess at the parade she looked PuRdYfUl lol i gots pictures of her so hahahahhaha lol but yeah theres to many things that happened this weekend to go into detail but yeah i had an absolutely EXCELLENT weekend!!! too da loo

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