[Pinkdonkey]'s diary

761904  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-03-11
Written: (4971 days ago)

Now I don't normally do tests, but i saw his one in someone's house, and it intriguedme.. Lol maybe it's just an excuse to stay logged onto Elftown ...

- 1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought ?
Is that really me ? God thank hairbrushes.
- 2. How much cash do you have on you?
None
- 3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?"?
More
- 4. Favorite planet?
3rd planet after the sun ... (name of a sitcom). I don't really, know, I guess Earth as it's the only one I've actually visited.
- 5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your mobile?
Florent
- 6. What was 4th text message?
"Non jss dsl ma puc mé jss a Val Tho é jrentr samedi.C dommage mé bn on se vera 2 jourapré.Lol.Gros bisous é fé de bo reves."
it's in french ...
- 7. What shirt are you wearing?
I'm wearing 2 shirts and a tank top. Yeah, it's that cold.
- 8. Do you "label" yourself as anything?
Nope.
- 9. Name the brand of shoes you're currently wearing?
I've got socks on, and my shoes are brandless anyway.
- 10. Bright or Dark room?
Bright I guess.
- 11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
Why have you made me do this ?
- 13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching the pilot episode of Veronica Mars. Better than what I thought it'll be.
- 14. What did your last text message you received on your mobile say?
In french, once again.
- 15. Where is your letter box?
Next to the second front door.
- 16. What's a word that you say a lot?
Me
- 17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
Elise or Elodie.
- 18. Last furry thing you touched?
My cat.
- 19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
Chocolate ...
- 20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
I've got a digital camera :P
- 21. Favorite age you have been so far?
Don't know ... maybe 7-8, or 10 ... 13 was good, and I guess 16 is okay.
- 22. Your worst enemy?
I don't have any worth mentioning.
- 23. What is your current desktop picture?
Chocolate ...
- 24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
"It's okay I think, he put some cold water on it"
- 25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
To be able to fly I think.
- 26. Do you like someone?
I like many people
- 27. The last song you listened to?
Roxanne - Sting or the Police, never remember which - at Elodie's
- 28. If the last person you spoke to was getting shot at, would you jump in front of the bullet?
Seeing as it's my dad, I guess the answer is yes. But then, I have no idea how courageous I am.
- 29. If you could punch 1 person in your life right now, who would it be?
I'm a pacifist.
- 30. What is the closest object to your left foot?
the book "Drawign on the right side of the brain" by Betty Edwards

761895  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-03-11
Written: (4971 days ago)

Time : 22h03
Music : none, except for the humming of my pc. Planning to download some Dropkick Murphys, the Verge, Smile Empty Soul and any other band I can thing of.
Mood : good, full stomach, philosophizing
Philosophizing about : I love inventing words. Really need to start the dictionnary so that others can understand me :P
Had a hell of a week back at school, with my french orals and everything. Went to bed at 1h30 on tuesday, had maths homework and a physics test to revise, got up at 6h45 ...
Spent all of Wednesday revising for the french orals, 15 texts ! And I felt like the more I learnt, the less I remembered. Wasn't stressed though. On thursday, first thought when waking up : French oral test today ! Horrible day, I was so stressed out that I almost puked. I couldn't eat at lunchtime. Natacha was feeling like me, Damien was on sedatives, Yumi and Florent were fine. Hate them. When I saw my turn was in 2h, I felt dizzy and almost fell of my chair.
Well anyway, I hate M. Queyle or however his name is spelt ! He kept on interruping me, doing stupid hand gestures that distracted me, and wanting me to say things that were completely out of subject. The text he gave me was okay, I knew it rather well, but he only gave half of it which meant that I couldn't say much. Oh and Florent was just after me, when he came into the room I almost had a laughing fit because the text came from a play he had acted out in class, playing a girl. He had looked sooo hilarious ! When I had finished, I saw Queyle writing stuff down on the noting sheet, looks like my note will be about 14/20, which is really good for an oral I'm told. But I'm not really pleased with it, I mean if I hadnt been as stressed, I could have had 15.
Other than that, Nancy Huston, a rather famous canadian author, living in France for the last 30 yrs or so came to our school. I'd read one of her books, about biculturalism and being bilingual which helped me solve some of my identity problems (I belong to one culture at home, and to another when I step outside. Not always easy.) She was such an interesting person, I loved it ! We're meeting her again on wednesday and then later on in the month as she puts on a some kind of spectacle (excuse the frenchism) where she reads bits of her books to music.
Friday was great, got 17,5/20 in SVT, didn't have class from 12h to 16h (english teachers weren't there) so we (yumi, natacha, damien and I) all went over to florent's. I spent 1h40 (the film was Training Day) cuddled up against florent, was nice :D Afterwards, damien kept on coming up to me and annoying me, and we ended up fighting friendly, but it was really strange, he kept on getting into awkward positions, and at one moment he was like stradling me when florent came in. Reeeeally weird. It annoyed me, hope he doesn't get too friendly. About florent, not sure where things are right now, I mean I keep on having cruches and un-crushes on him, can't make up my mind ! Well first thing of is to know if he actually wants to go out with me or not. And seeing how secretive I am about stuff like that, I wouldn't ever dream of admitting that I like him to Natacha and Yumi, and guesswork is just annoying me right now.
Saw Zeina today, didn't do any work, was nice. Jeremy (my brother) asked me to do some kind of bull/minotaur head for him to illustrate a presentation he's giving about a book, except that it kinda ... well deviated. It's still a fierce-looking minotaur head, except that he has piercings and weird spikes and jewelery and looks a bit unconventionnal (if a conventionnal minotaur does exist). Luckily Jeremy loved it, but I'm just not sure whether his teacher will.

Woot ! During this thing, I've finally worked out what exactly triggers my drawing skills. I need some kind of photo, or original artwork that will at first inspire me, even though my drawing will then turn out so diferent that the only similarity will be the angle or something. That means I need to practise on drawing from memory, as I will then hopefully just be able to think of a drawing and then reproduce it. Still have a long work to do though.
However, when I look back at my drawings from the beginning of the year, and worst from last year, it's amazing the progress I've done ! I'm still in no shape to compete with many people out there, but I'm getting better everyday, and learn more for each drawing I do. Van Gogh encourages me. That may sound weird, but what i want to say is that Van Gogh only worked as an artist in the last 10 yrs of his life (from 27 to 37 yrs old) and spent the first 2 yrs teaching himself to draw. I've seen some of his earlier drawings, and they aren't that good. Compared to his later works, the difference is astounding ! I am by no means saying that I will ever reach Van Gogh's level and skill, but merely that improving is always impossible, and that I won't be discouraged by unfavourable results. So yeah, one day I will call my drawings artwork :D

[Pinkdonkey]

756543  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-03-01
Written: (4981 days ago)

Time : 7h35 pm
Music : Coldplay - A rush of blood to the head
Mood : Okayish, not feeling as high (happy, not stoned) as 40mn ago

Didn't do much today, even though I swore to continue my homework. Lazy me. Shit shit shit this means I'll have to do it ... Friday evening ? All of it !

Created a blog on www.blogger.com, had heaps of ideas for articles but forgot all of them. Guess it'll have to wait.
Started a sketch for the Elftron Sci-Fi contest, couldn't get it looking like I wanted. Stupid useless drawing skills. I suck.

Homework (in order of priority) :
- TPE Conclusion. At least a full page
- TPE personal synthesis. Between one and two pages.
=> Friday evening
- Maths DM. Will take at least 3h. => Start tonight ?
- French revision for my Bac. Do the Utopie texts ? 3 of them at least, + 2 more de Musset => 1 in train thursday evening, 1 friday, 1 saturday, 1 monday and 1 tuesday.
- read the Tempest. Will start thrusday evening

Program :
- Thursday : going to Grenoble
morning : shopping w/ mum and élodie, get pants
lunch : somewhere in town
afternoon : leave around 1h, go see Natacha, work till ... 3h ?
meet up with élodie + benjamin around 3h30, with nat of course, phone florent, chill, go to bar, leave on train around 5h30, sleep at élodie's
- Friday : see film (=> 1h to 4h), other than that work on french and TPE, draw that cyborg.
- Saturday : spend the afternoon at Zeina's with élo, morning work (maths + french)
- Sunday : finnish working, get bag ready, draw a bit, stress out, calm down, go to boarding, get ready to go back to school.

Well that's about it for now. Might do some french instead of maths right now. Got to think bout an article for my blog.

754886  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-02-26
Written: (4984 days ago)

Am I turning emo or what ??
Shoot me. Kill me on the spot.
Please.

Oh god, how emotastic of me.

Please, don't tell me I'm turning into one of them !

I wanna stay a happy babs !
Hmm ... I've been getting more and more babs since I've entered high-school ... at least got rid of my punk/goth tendencies.

Nah, I'll definively stay myself, no way I'm going to be judged according to any group I belong to.
I'll be original on my own.
Not goth like original, which is "let's all be original and wear black ! just like all the other original goths out there !"
Though that goes for everyone else
"Let's be original ... together !"
Yeah right.

How english of me.

Uh, typical ! (for all those who have read Watching the English !)

754882  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-02-26
Written: (4984 days ago)

Time : 21h
Music : The Beatles - Entire White Album - Entire Abbey Road Album
Mood : Pissed off. Wrote bout 3 bloody paragraphs and Mozilla firefox decided to fuck up and shut down. Before I had saved anything.

For my own pleasure, it went along these lines :

Wow, I haven't written in this for so long ... I've been on Elftown for 1 year and 2 days ! And I forgot to celebrate ! *hates self*

Tme + Music : same as above
Mood : feeling bored, useless, haven't done anythin today but strangely satisfied. not anymore ... ^^
Must do : bloody homework - phona natacha for thursday - drawing for elodie - homework - concentrate - make skirt - homework
Today : Came back from Victor's around 3h40 am. Slept till 12h30. Nice evening. Should see each other more often, once every 4 months isn't enough.
Started drawing, fucked it up. I hate how it's so random, sometimes it ends up really great, but most of the time turns out to be crap. Why can't it be like Yumi's ? My artistic ego is feeling rather diminished. At least my writing skills have improved. In english.
Why do i have such an over active imagination ? grumble grumble If I didn't spend most of my days dreaming i would have got what I dream about done. Like dating Florent instead about dreaming of dating him. grumble grumble ... etc grumble some more Feeling depressed etc.
Little conscience voice comes on : "Stop moaning about yourself"..."No one wants to hear your silly teenage problems" ... Writing for myself you idiot ... "Hypocritical teenager, like all of them"...


And that's about all I remember. At least I'm now feeling pissed off instead of depressed.

Don't I just *love* listening to myself.

575109  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-05-15
Written: (5271 days ago)

Hey ! this is a message to all my friends, sorry I haven't been on a lot lately but school started again a couple of weeks ago and I only have access to internet during the week-end when I come back home. These last two weeks have also been really exausting, I've had heaps of exams (and big ones too) so I've been spending most of my week-ends revising. Anyway, this to say that it should be getting better next week and I promise to spend more than 30mn on elftown next week-end ! I haven't forgotten any of you even if I don't have the time to talk to you much and I hope I'll see ya all soon !
love

Pinkdonkey

553969  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-04-17
Written: (5299 days ago)

Hey ... Holiday Time !!!
god i'm so pleased they've finally arrived, another week of school and i won't even be able to keep my eyes open enough to ... to ... to do something really interesting where you have to keep your eyes open, I'm so tired !
by the way, it's snowing. i know that the weather is not most interesting topic, but we're in the middle of april and barely 10 days ago i was getting sun-taned during the lunchbreak at school ! real change of weather that is ...
hum ... gotta go, a superb snowball fight is just waiting for me to begin !

546422  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-04-09
Written: (5307 days ago)

hmm ... been quite some time since i've written anything in here. i guess it's hard to find the time with everything else going on, exams, work, friends etc ...
I really disagree with the present school system (in France) where I often start at 8h in the morning and finish at 6h, having only a one-hour break at lunchtime... it's extremely hard to combine very good marks and having a life in this system. I'm sure I could do better at school, but I don't want to go to bed at 1h in the morning everynight. 11h at night is already late enough as I have to get up a 6h40...
I don't actually care about notes that much (even if mine are quite good) because they're just there to fool people. It's not because you get a bad mark that you didn't understand the lesson. Anyway, how can you possibly rate intelligence or learning abilities out of 10 or 20 ? But then that's another topic ...
I really think the whole system should be changed and I am currently working on an alternative one. It's still quite primary but It's growing bigger and bigger each day as I discern the problems with the current one.
(By the way, I hate it when people complain about the system (education, politics or anything else) but don't give any solutions.)
I also find it silly to want 15, 16,17 or even 18 year old to know what job they want to do later. How can you really know, having had no experience working ? And I know that on my part, I'm just interested in so many things ... I'd love to keep on learnin for years, but not what I learn at school. There should be many more different classes available (especially manual or dealing with art) but with less students,
and we should be able to do completely different subjects at the same time and also change much more easily if we dislike them.
It will also be a lot easier if teachers had to go through a psychological test to see how the behave with children and teenagers and if they have the personality to teach.

i think i'll stop now for today or it will be very hard to stop later, plus this is getting a bit gloomy ... must be the weather :/

"Shoot for the moon; cos even if you miss, you'll land upon the stars ..."

519494  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-03-11
Written: (5336 days ago)

finally...week-end...ahh...

It's so nice to see the lovely curves of the screen, to push down all the buttons of the keyboard and listen to the calming "tick clock pat toc" of the keys...oh computer I miss you so much during the week !

I'm seriously thinking of writing an "Ode to unlimited ADSL" soon ... sad isn't it ?
:)

512429  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-03-03
Written: (5344 days ago)

oh god, i've been sick since sunday night and i've been missing school since tuesday .... i'm sooooooooooo bored !!! ^_^      I've basically been spending my days in front of tv, the computer or reading a book...I feel miserable when not drugged up to the eyeballs with medicine and anyway no one's home...so the hell to it, i ain't got nothing to do so i'm going to complain about it :
"oh god, i've been sick since sunday..." oops, already done that :)
okay, that was soooo not funny or interesting or anything but i've got an excuse. I'm feeling sick and miserable. i'll probably be cheerful in a few hours, but right now i need some TLC ... :(
*goes and gives brother a hug, thus covering him in germs*

507814  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-02-27
Written: (5348 days ago)

oh great, i'm starting school again tomorrow ... my wonderful timetable makes me start on monday at 8h and i finish at 6h ==> 9h (+1h lunchbreak) :exactly what you need to start school again after the holidays or the weekend ^_^ and just to makes things easier, i'm going back to boarding tonight (which saves me from getting up tomorrow morning at 5h30, i get to "sleep in" till 6h30 :/ )
anyway i'm looking forward to seeing my friends, having a bit of excitment around, having fun at boarding blah-blah-blah ... well that's what i'm trying to make myself believe. what i actually want to do is stay at home lazing around or spending my day on the computer trying to find a life worth living :) oh that's pretty pessimistic of me, i've got to admit i'm looking forward to seeing my hopefully-future-boyfriend and asking him why the hell he took a vitamine packet full of cereals to my place for the party (which he accidentally forgot) and seeing the look of embarrasment on his face (there must be an embarrassing explanation to this right? otherwise what's the point of asking? ) while he answers and i trie to supress my growing want of laughter .... muhahaha !!!
have a nice week ;)

506789  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-02-26
Written: (5349 days ago)

urgh...must keep eyes open...*huuuge yawwwwwwn*...must not fall asleep...*falls asleep on keyboard*...
3 cup of coffees later (not decaff !!) : hum ... i'm very tired and i'm going back to school monday (it's the end of the febuary holidays in france, well at least for me) ... I guess that sleeping for 4h last night (this morning will be more appropriate) isn't going to make it easier :) urgh ...
none of you probably wants to know all this but i'll pretend that you're all really interested and i can keep on writing about my boring teenage life, as just putting things on paper (well... screen) helps to get on with it.
Anyway, i went over to some friends last night and it turned out to be a crappy evening. i hadn't seen any of these friends for quite a while as i'm in a different lycée (ie. highschool or something like that) and a boarder while they are all together at the same school :( we were all best friends last year (when we were still in the same school) but things have changed quite a bit since ... they were all talking about people i didn't know, parties i hadn't gone to or teachers and classes they had ... i didn't have a clue of what was going on and when i asked they just said things like "it's not really interesting", "i'll tell you later" or the best one of all "you won't understand". no one seemed to be interested in what i had to say and just to make things better, one of them wasn't really speaking to me because of a really stupid month-old squabble ... of the ones with whom things hadn't changed or if they had, it was positive, none of them had been able to come.
strangely, i'm not actually that upset, i guess that it's because i won't see them till the next holidays anyway (we're all boarders and don't have much time to see each other during the week-end) and i find most of them have somehow ... regressed ... in maturaty. or maybe it's just me that has become more mature :)
thank you, invisible audience, writing it down has made things clear in my mind now and i kinda know what road to follow :)

505009  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-02-24
Written: (5351 days ago)

Today started off quite nicely, I managed to get up without too many difficulties, did a tiny bit of cleaning up, had fun chating with friends or just lazing about while my mum went off shopping...and then she came back.
She had gone to Emmaus (a second-hand charity shop) where she always manages to get the most amazing things and so the thought of what she might bring back was lingering at the back of my mind. I had decided to ignore it and had pushed it far away in the deep dusty shelves of the "Ignore" section of my brain. But not thinking about did not change the facts : my mother came back with three ... sewing machines. Which brings the total of sewing machines in the house to 15... You might ask what's the point of having 15 of the bloody machines around when you only need one to sew ?? I ask myself the same.
The truth is, my mother collects them. Oh no, she doesn't go in for stamps, or coins, or even garden gnomes, but sewing machines and fabric and such other stuff. She has a whole room filled up from floor to ceiling with fabric, books on sewing, sewing machines, needles, threads and God know what. She even belongs to several sewing Internet groups. So you can see how I have been brought up ... and in 15 years I have not got used to it and I still feel pity - and horror - at this great decadence. So forgive me if I get slightly crazy when I hear the word "s*w*ng m*ch*ne" (even just writing it makes me wince). And at least you now know the origin of my slight strangeness ;o) 

504441  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-02-24
Written: (5352 days ago)

First day in Elftown ... got interrupted in the middle of reading the help file too install a firewire card...took about an hour and a half and I've had to reboot the computer about 8 times ... arghhhh !! So I guess I'll learn more about this site later on. I'm not new to Elfwood as I'm a great fan and browse through it as often as I can :) I'm not a writer or artist on Elfwood but I'm hoping to get a SciFi/Fantasy Gallery when I'll have the time to fill in the form ; I'm not such a great artist but can draw a bit and it's mainly to be more part of it as I go there very often :) Anyway it's 1am so I might be going to bed soon and I just noticed how long and boring my entry is ... I'll try and write something more interesting tomorrow ! (well further on today is more appropriate).

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